|Date of Birth||April 19, 1995|
|Stage||The Mosh Pit|
|Unlockable Costume||Lewis Legend|
Zed is a zombie from Lollicock Sainchaw. He loves scriming, having sexual intercourse with corpses, getting cut in half, nomming on some rats, and combing his unnaturally large mohawk which is actually made of his collection of XXXXL-size red strap-on dildos. It's the only thing keeping his rotting zombie skull together. His weakness is piss.
How he got in the gameEdit
Role in the storyEdit
Zed went to the punk store to get some goth accessories, such as 37 cockrings for his dildohawk. However, then he saw a hedgeheg by the name of Coldsteel. He noticed the hedgeheg's extremely masculine purple fur, as well as his earrings and eyeshadow and other things that men obviously wear. Zed looked at his navel piercing and then got mad, and challenged Coldsteel to a goff-off. That battle was one of the most intense in history.
Wait a minute. The Shrek Toilet is in Left 4 Dead 2... 4 + 2 = 6... I have 2 balls... 6 ÷ 2 = 3... L4D2 is a zombie game... Zed is a zombie... 3 points in the triangle... 3 letters in Zed's name...
G-GASP! Z-ZED IS AN ILLUMONADO!